Yes … I Did

People have been questioning the validity of the subject matter which I blog about. The things I say, the things I buy, et cetera et cetera et cetera… I am here to tell you; Yes, I did do/ say/ buy that.

Now on to the important stuff.

I am not a fucking juke box. You do not push a button on my chest and get to hear the song you want when you want it. When you come and try and push the elusive song-button, all you are doing is pushing MY buttons. You should know better than to bark orders at the dj, ESPECIALLY if you work at the club. If you are barking orders at the dj, chances are very high that whatever you are saying is asinine, because you are asinine, and will be ignored.

One Chris Santos met such a fate Saturday at Coco De Ville where I work.

Realizing that Chris Santos is an idiot, I ignored his pleas to not play a song if it is older than 6 months, especially since everyone knows the best song in the history of music came out in 2007… Crank That. As Chris’ barrage continued, I informed everyone that I was not going to be working there anymore. He assured the powers that be that he would provide Coco De Ville with a better dj the next week. Knowing this, I supplied the audience with much needed microphone entertainment fueled by bottles of Ace of Spades champagne. I reassured everyone that “the good dj was going to be there next week” and I even gave Chris a shout out in classic hip hop form; “shout out to my man Chris Santos”.

A few days later, I got a text from Chris. I had his number in my phone when I got the text, but I played dumb and hoped that I would shatter his ego enough when he found out that I did not save his number when he gave it to me and he would leave me alone. Here is the conversation:

Chris Santos
hey just heard u said something on the mic to me sat nite. What was it? Can’t wait to hear

Who’s this?

Chris Santos


Chris Santos
Chris santos. Is this stone?


Chris Santos
Lol well let me ask u how many chris santos do u know that u worked with sat nite that u said something on the mic about?

(grown men don’t write “LOL” to one another. at least I don’t)

You can’t possibly think you’re the only person whom I blaspheme publicly. There are way too many dumbfucks to keep track of. They usually get written off immediately hence my confusion as to who YOU were.

Chris Santos
I don’t reallly understand what u just wrote lol maybe u can slow it down for this dumbfuck lol. And explane.

(note the mispelling and constant use of “LOL”)

You get the general theme. That’s what’s most important

Chris Santos
Ur right I do.
Because people question the reality of my blogs, I have taken pictures of my phone with the text thread.

Yes… I did say that.

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One Response to Yes … I Did

  1. DJ says:

    Stone, your the fucking man.

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